O Canada! By correctly predicting a 5-way Canadian bet at the Northern Trust, Tron is back in the mix and looking to catch a struggling group of DJ, Neil and Randy at the BMW this week. All picks are highlighted below:

 As the lead has slimmed and the gap between first and fifth (sorry, Soly) has narrowed significantly, DJ is no longer shooting from the hip. Instead, his research indicates that Collin Morikawa might back up his second career MC with another win. Collin's T13 at the collegiate Illini Invitational will certainly give him the sturdiest of legs to stand on this week.

I must thank the Pieman for keeping it easy on me by bundling his matchups into a parlay rather than a TC Canadian/Heinz cluster of complication. It'll be all or nothing for DJ as he is backing a group of classy ball-strikers that can struggle with the putter on occasion. The prevailing thought is that unfamiliar greens, which will be the case for most at Olympia Fields this week, tend to neutralize poor putters. If so, the ball-striking prowess of Hideki, Morikawa, McRib, Billy Ho and G-dub should allow them to rise up the board in comparison to the stronger bosses of the moss.

 The X-Man has been kicking the tires on contending again since his close call at Colonial. Three of his four wins on Tour have come in no cut events. Has no weaknesses and should translate well to a venue that’s new to almost everyone. The McRib has uncharacteristically struggled for a period of a couple months now, without even a backdoor Top 10 to boast about. Despite recent performance, Rors has the ability to flip the switch at a moment's notice, so investing in him at inflated odds compared to his norm is hard to knock. The same could be said for Patrick Cantlay, just to a lesser degree. Cantlay will need a much better performance than he's turned in of late if he intends to play in Atlanta next week (#37 in FEC standings). 

Joel "good morning" Dahmen got into a twitter debate with the crew earlier this week about how many rounds it would take him to reach Dustin's total of -30 playing TPC Boston. Joel humbly answered 100...but given his form this year we think it would take him decidedly less than a triple digit total. Neil expects Joel to bounce back from his disappointing MC in Boston and make a run at qualifying for the Tour Championship via a top 5 finish this week. Notably absent from Neil's picks is Chez, who failed to qualify for this week's BMW.

 Just like Jason Kokrak, Randy went all in 2020 last week by making one selection, backing Phil simply to top the alleged manipulator Alex Noren. Turns out the big guy did not have pocket aces...or kings...or queens.

Randy's reset this week led he and Neil to some similar conclusions. As Randy is hoping for a bounce back week, so too are Rory, Cantlay and Fitzy, all of whom make Randy's selections in some form or fashion. You've gotta appreciate the "if you fall, get back up" spirit the big guy is showcasing in those selections.

Finally, Randy expects the world's eldest 24 year-old in Scottie Scheffler to show some signs of fatigue this week, allowing Hideki to race past him up the leaderboard. Despite failing to reach the winner's circle in his rookie campaign to date, Scottie has all but clinched his spot in Atlanta next week via consistently strong form throughout the year. 

: Weeks of disappointing results were all washed away with a long-awaited Canadian cash last week. If you thought Tron would ditch the strategy after one week of going 5/5, then you don't know the TC way. Tough scene alert: the Canadian includes a fade of Tron's boy Scottie this week.

With some spending $ in his pocket this week, TC is donating 5 nuggets to the cause by picking the cursed Tony Finau to actually win this week. Not to mention the 5 nugget donation on a parlay of Woodland, Finau, Day and Adam Scott to all win their DK Sportsbook betting groups. The payout of +36350 is juicy...but I am confirming it'll never happen.

Max had a disappointing bogey on his 36th hole last week to miss the cut on the number, forcing him to sweat out his spot in the FEC standings all weekend. Now in the field, TC expects Max to play free from any expectations which could allow him to contend this week.

Wednesday's 7-club tune-up for Bryson could give him some competitive mojo before the tournament begins. A win on the venue where DeChambeau of course won his U.S. Am title would be less than shocking.

: Webb and Jon Rahm contributed to a rare positive week for Soly at the Northern Trust. Still very much in the basement, Soly is turning towards a young star in Viktor Hovland to help him climb out. Hovland has now likely lost his strangehold on the Arnold Palmer award as ROY on Tour, yet still has a chance to reclaim the title from Scheffler if he can have a couple impressive weeks to finish out his rookie campaign.

A couple "hot tips" led Soly to take Hideki and Nick Taylor this week despite their struggles of late. Hot tips always work out well, so these picks are surefire. Like TC, Bryson makes Soly's list of selections this week. A MC last week is not enough to deter the C-Suite from backing the biggest of golfers and debatably the new needle.

: My Kiz pick last week paid dividends, so why not go back to the well? He's a guy that is motivated by the sums of money at stake throughout the playoffs and thrives under the stakes. Surprised to see no love for Rahm this week from the crew, so I'll happily take him even though his odds are short. Agree with Neil's thought than Xander has been knocking on the door of late and is poised for a breakthrough. Also taking the coat-rack as it's put-up or shut-up time for his all-in claim. Will Jason hold 'em, or fold 'em like a cheap suit? 

The standings below are as of completion of play last week. I know they are not at all the same as the graphics that appeared in the video...but trust my accounting methods have been thorough and above board. If you like my perspective and want more content related to the crew's picks and year-to-date status, I can be found on twitter and instagram 

NLU Picks and Preview - BMW

It was another lackluster week for the crew in most cases, but a solid return for Big Randy now brings him ever closer to eclipsing DJ and strapped brother Neil in the standings. Picks for the playoff opener are highlighted below:

 Had there not been an impossible run by Jim Herman over the weekend, DJ's loyal former troop of the Bob Parsons army would have given back DJ the lead he once had after Webb Simpson win at RBC Heritage. Still, Billy Horschel was able to cash the Top 10 bet to keep DJ from having a total loss at Wyndham.

The rib still hasn't shown signs of life at major championships...or really since the Tour resumed at Colonial. But, as DJ so rightly pointed out, he is Mr. PGA Tour. Also the only 2x winner of the FedEx cup title, as he will be defending that second title. WIth a win this week, he would be well on his way to a third. Just not sure where DJ sees the good form coming from.

DJ's last two picks have been familiar plays by the crew and both will need big weeks to move on to Chicago and the BMW. Harold Varner played well last week at Wyndham, finishing T7 after leading thru the first 18 holes. Still in search of his first Tour win. So too is Sam Burns, happy to be in the playoffs again after some solid results post-COVID break. The depth of this week's field leads to some solid potential payouts for guys like Harold and Sam who aren't necessarily the most consistent players in the field.

 The Waka Flocka Flame puns may have given Sepp some bad vibes last week, as both he and Neil's staple Chez Reavie pick didn't even live long enough to keep Neil's interest over the weekend. A better would actually have been a little MC parlay.

This week Icarito's self-proclaimed strategy is to pick "short guys that just hit it good." Again, field depth is making those Top 10's look pretty juicy to Neil, actually making up four of his five picks. Xander, honest Abe, Lawddddd Tyrrell and Mrs. Longsocks make up Icarito's lineup of 5'8" flushers he expects to make the front page this week. The Chez top 20 isn't even worth wasting breath on at this point.

 Thankfully still (somewhat) vertical, Randy was able to spill his only pick of the week next to his associate DJ Pie. Randy's consitently conservative picks has allowed him to continually make a slow indent into the lead that DJ and Neil had built. The strategy is certainly no different this week.

A full 100 piece nugget count relies on the only Champions Tour eligible player in the field this week: Phil Mickelson. He will need to beat possibly the most famous OWGR manipulator of our time in Alex Noren to give Randy a positive return this week. Alex has played well of late, though he can't boast the course history Phil can at TPC Boston. Of course, one of Phil's most famous flop shots of his career came from the right side below the 18th green here. Oh, you thought I meant Phil always plays well here? Psh. As Soly and the datagolf guys dicussed on this week's pod, Phil is only truly above average at that place down in Georgia. A poor performance from Phil this week will leave Randy feeling about as well as he did the morning after the recording of this week's video.

: The curmudgeon has struck again, going against the grain by picking a Canadian 5-way instead of the Heinz 57 that garenered so much attention in previous weeks. Five separate matchups will be included in the Canadian play, which is honestly too cumbersome to break down given most would rather just see how the results pan out.

A couple young (maybe not super young) hitters make up a couple TC Top 10 locks of this week, with Max Homa at 20:1 to do so and Marc Leishman at 11:1. Leish has struggled uncharacteristically recently, likely baking in a lot of value in backing him on a course that typically plays closer to the firm & fast end of the spectrum. Leish is ever-capable of breaking his slump in an instant and jumping right into the thick of a chase for a title. Similarly, Tommy Fleetwood has been unable to shake off the rust stemming from the long break. You'd have to figure it is only a matter of time before something clicks for the distinguished Englishman as well. The Keith Mitchell play very well could be a result of a classic little game of eenie-meenie-miney-moe. Who knows where that came from...but I guess we are coming off a week where the 600-1 Jim Herman emerged victorious. 

: Soly's extensive research has not resulted in any level of success. What's even more irritating is that the undeniably "free-wheeling" approaches of the Strapped Boys have netted exponentially greater returns. The C-Suite may need to look into further budget cuts on the upcoming seasons as the Strapped Boys may not be so strapped any longer.

In order of their odds, Webber, yung Hov and Hungjae start Soly's search for improvement as the playoffs begin this week. Each of the three are known for their iron-play and Strokes Gained: Approach prowess. With Paul Casey and Phil and Chez as the only real threats, Soly is riding with Jon Rahm to finish as low Arizona St. Sun Devil this week, which is a play I love especially given it is still somehow + odds.

Finau is for sure not going to close it out this week, but respect to Soly for sticking to his guns. He is clearly displaying a desire to be there if the curse of Puerrrrrrto RRRRRRico shall ever be broken. The Boston (or really Norton/Providence/not Boston at all as TC pointed out in this week's TrapDraw) forecast is for more Finau disappointment this week.

: Kiz has been absolutely rolling his rock of late and loves them dolla signs. He will come prepared this week on a venue where driving distance is not at a premium, again. P-Reed has won the Northern Trust in two of the last four years and I think he will be right there again this week. Webb almost won with about his B- game last week. Scary. At 30:1, I love his chances  if he brings the A game with him this week. Jason Kokrak will need a Top 20/25 finish or so if he would like to move on to Chicago next week. If his injury isn't an issue, I think he's poised to do so after a solid Top 15 at Sedgefield last week. Back to the parlay board this week as well, as last week's parlay hit at +800, keeping my head above water. 

NLU Picks and Preview - Northern Trust

While Neil and DJ have been jockeying back and forth in the standings like Rahm and JT in the OWGR in recent weeks, Randy has pieced together some solid weeks to sneak up on their heels. Can the big guy catch them this week? Or will his performance resemble one of his many  money round failures? Picks and standings for the Wyndham are highlighted below:

 By virtue of backing Xander as low Callaway staffer, DJ was able to squeeze by Neil just one week after Neil passed DJ's total via the WGC-Memphis results. That beautiful bloke Tommy Fleetwood cost DJ last week in his search of a mega parlay, but DJ has a short memory. He's chosen tummyfleets again this week, expecting he's had sufficient time to knock all the COVID rust off by now.

DJ made mention that he would be enlisting a certain PXG troop this week in Billy Horschel. Sadly, Billy has actually been discharged from his service and is operating free from the bind of any (equipment) service obligations. Nonetheless, DJ believes the noted iron-play specialist will thrive on a second-shot venue in Sedgefield CC. Maybe Neil can pay Billy Ho a visit to get some additional "What's in the Bag?" footage.

Patrick Rodgers has become a bit of a forgotten man on a week-to-week basis despite his expected success following a wonderful career at Stanford. DJ's expectations are that Rodgers has "No Tree Putts" on his way to a solid Top 10 this week. His last pick is that the winning margin will be exactly three strokes on Sunday. Is there any logic at all in picking something like that? Well who could say...actually I could say: No.

 A fruitless week made Neil's reign at #1 shorter than a Greg Popovich interview. In his defense, Neil only claims to be good at 

 things: slingin' merch and doing some "googley" research. S/O Sir Nick.

Neil's back to his roots this week and keeping it simple as can be. Chez battled his way to earn himself a weekend tee time by shooting a back nine 32 on Friday evening. Unfortunately he was unable to make his way up the leaderboard over the weekend on a course that didn't necessarily favor his style of play. Now back on a shorter track that is much more manageable for Reavie, Neil's placing 50 of his nugs on him to contend and finish in the Top 10.

Here are a few horrible puns for Icarito's second and final pick: Sepp "Straka Flocka Flame":

When rolling it well, Sepp showcases his nerve, making solid strokes with "No Hands"

When asked where his first Tour win may come, Straka pointed to the Valspar specifically because of his history of going "Hard in da Paint"

Even if Sepp plays well this week, the lack of fans will keep him from getting the "Round of Applause" he'd deserve.

After Straka was told he had received a ringing endorsement from Neil, who expects him to crack the Top 10 in Greensboro this week, he replied, "O, Let's do it"

 Phil and Morikawa headlined a successful two-leg parlay last week that brings Randy ever closer in the standings. Randy's more conservative approach has allowed him to net positive points in three of his last four weeks. We like that.

Randy is employing DJ's strategy of taking one wild ass guess this week, namely that there will be an ace in round 3. My guess is that Randy's eyes lit up when he saw the jump in the odds from Friday to Saturday and probably forgot that there will be less than half the field playing that day. He's also sticking to his guns with the winner making anything other than par at the 72nd, which I happen to love at Sedgefield's typically difficult finishing hole. He also believes Brooks may be a little checked out following a letdown last week. Between the cross-country flight, knee and back question marks and mental fatigue, there's some value in picking Brooks to miss the cut.

Randy's biggest bets of the week also follow his heart just as Neil's did. Harris has been absolutely flushing it this year, especially as of late. No one is more aware of that than the big guy. HV3 is returning to familiar territory in NC this week. He seems a good bet @ +335 to Top 20 after showing some good signs in NOCAL last week. 

: With limited success in the first two attempts, TC has benched the Heinz approach for the Wyndham. Truthfully, it was likely only benched because the matchup board is a little less extensive this week. After winning a 10 point "budget bet" against Soly by virute of Scottie Scheffler outpacing Lanto over the course of last weekend's pay, TC has a 110 point budget to spend. As you'll see below, Soly has either forgotten or chosen to ignore the consequences of his loss. Tron turned those 10 points into a chance to return 160 if Patty BD earns his second career win at Sedgefield. 

TC's approach has been to make numerous bets and dip his toes into many different waters. Look where it's gotten him. A change of pace is a welcome change this week, as Tron has chosen to put all of his eggs in one basket. There just happens to be numerous holes in that particular basket. Tron is backing Jordan Spieth to Top 10 this week with a full 100 point endorsement. Spieth may have the largest amount of space between his floor and ceiling of anyone on Tour. Consequently, I won't hazard a guess as to how the struggling phenom will perform this week. 

: On a second shot golf course, Soly has turned to three terrific iron players to help him potentially escape his spot at the bottom of the standings. Despite losing 10 points from his budget (discussed above), Soly has fully sent a 100 point lineup. I'll let the guys police themselves on that matter.

Webb Simpson is a staple at Sedgefield and has cashed Top 25's in 7 of 11 starts on the Donald Ross design. Now playing arguably the best golf of his life, it seems impossible he would fall short of a Top 20 this week as the Vegas favorite. Brendon Todd has proven his game travels throughout this year. I wouldn't be surprised if he fills it up again this week where distance will not be as imperative as last week.

Kyle Stanley has struggled mightily on the greens throughout the year, placing him outside the Top 125 required to qualify for next week's postseason opener. He's been in this position before and stood tall to the pressure of what is normally a more do or die moment. As he still ranks near the top of a majority of the important ball-striking categories, Soly is taking a chance that the putter may get just warm enough to pay off some of the chances he consistently gives himself.

: Sitting at 130 in the FEC standings, Stanley likely needs a finish of 36th or better to earn enough points to move up the 5 spots needed to get into the playoffs. I think he'll rise to the occasion. Paul Casey is good. He's playing well. But I never believe in him enough to feel comfortable picking him to win. He just doesn't have "it." Brice Garnett held the 54 hole lead here last year and can fill it up when on the positive end of his typically streaky play. Love his odds on the unusual "Top 5 American" play in a wide open field. Speaking of streaky players, give me a little "Si Woo shakin' that ass" all the way to a Group "C" triumph this week paired with Webb > Reed. Webb's just better. Fabian Gomez has won twice on Tour, which was news to me as I researched this week. At 123 in the FEC, I'll look for him to have a good week to maintain his position.

NLU Picks and Preview - Wyndham

I'm excited to pass along the crew's picks for what will hopefully be the most difficult test of the year in professional golf. The potential for 

 swings in the standings is here, and is all highlighted below:

 If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Riding with Chez paid off for Neil last year and has already granted Neil an early lead in the standings (if you exclude my expertise). While the oddsmakers continue to disrespect the veteran grinder, Neil will continue to bank his nugs. A top 20 from Reavie this week would put a smile on St. Rappeo's face up above.

Top 10 plays ruled Neil's remaining plays. Opting for accuracy over distance, Neil has chosen Matt Fitzpatrick, Jaco Niemann and Brendon Todd to overcome the length disadvantage they may have at Winged Foot and finish in the Top 10. The firmer the course gets, the more I like the chances for those three.

Tommy lad has gone under the radar for the most part since the Tour's restart. While most were snoozing on the professional golf scene last week in favor of NFL week 1, Tommy turned in a Sunday 64 in Portugal to give eventual champion George Coetzee a scare. After a bit of a flight across the pond, Neil will hope the form Fleetwood flashed last Sunday will translate to the big apple.

 As simple formula will remain this week for Randy. Typically though, Randy doesn't take the big swings as he is this week with his decision to choose Patrick Cantlay to win. Cantlay hasn't had his best stuff of late, but profiles well to capture his first major at a difficult U.S. Open venue.

Phil had a mediocre week at Safeway, but Randy is hoping for a quick bounceback in Westchester, where Phil is likely feeling some mixed emotions this week. To finish as the low lefty, he will need to best Brian Harman, Bubba and Big Bob Macintyre. J-Day's form was much improved around the time of the "Jack Nicklaus swing", falling off lately during the oh-so-prestigous FEC playoffs. Hopefully the hellish Winged Foot back won't cause the 'ole backside too much harm.

 After cashing a Canadian last week myself, I love to see TC chasing the dream yet again. The theme of the picks? No theme, really. In fact, he admitted to hating a couple of his picks, notably Harris English over Hatton. He has been flushing it, however.

Feels silly not to endorse DJ's chances, even if its odds are pretty short. To boil Soly's blood, I'm going to point of DJ is the "odds on" favorite. A couple of Aussies round out Tron's picks, as he's taking a flier on J-Day as Randy did as well as Adam Scott.

Worth noting that in the very same video where TC clowned Randy for not using all 100 of his points in a week last season, TC has only alotted 90 of his points to this week's picks. The you hate to see it of the week before the week has even begun.

: Much like Jason Kokrak, DJ is going all-in with pocket everything this week, putting almost all his eggs in the JT basket. A JT win could be a killshot to the rest of the crew as it could net up to about 1,900 potential points for DJ if all falls into place. If not, he could cement his spot at the bottom of the standings in the earlygoing.

The cocaine train will have at least one passenger this week, as DJ is throwing a trivial 10 nuggets on Spieth to Top 20. His thinking is that if the course plays as difficult is advertised, Jordan may be able to grind it around as well as anyone. My thinking is the exact opposite. A wild Spieth does not sound like a healthy mix for a brutal test at Winged Foot.

: Soly's approach in the new season seems to be much different than last season. Unfortunately, last week yielded similarly disappointing results. Smaller plays and some round 1 bets are the bones of Soly's off-speed approach for this week's U.S. Open.

Rahm and DJ are the favorites and also the plays for Soly. Anticipating Olympia Fields was a good indicator for what Winged Foot will play like, Soly is expecting DJ and Rahm to have similar results. Also profiling as a grinder who won't be intimidated by U.S. Open conditions is dbstraitvibin', coming off an extremely sound rebound season. One might say Berger may have been a prime candidate for Comeback Player of the Year...

: X-man seems to be ready to break through and finally grasp his first major this week. At least that's what Poppa Schauffele and I think. Speaking of Pops', watch out for the baby bump from Rory this week. And I don't mean fat Rors is coming back. Fitzy always seems to play well on these firm, fast and difficult tests as he did at Bay Hill, Memorial, Olympia and even Brookline at the U.S Am. I expect more of the same from him here. If all else fails, I expect Ben An and Chez to be sleepers this week and cash that little parlay.

The standings below are as of completion of play last week. If you like my perspective and want more content related to the crew's picks and year-to-date status, I can be found on twitter and instagram 

2020 US Open @ Winged Foot Picks & Preview 

Glory's first shot! This week's PGA brings a long awaited (now 54 weeks) return of 

 predictions for what may happen in California this week. As a bonus, each of us has been generously given an opportunity to win a free 50 points by picking this week's top-finishing Callaway staffer, regardless of odds. The potential for 

 swings in the standings is highlighted below:

 A new leader! Sticking with Chez has proven fruitful as Neil has been able to feed the haters a healthy helping of humble pie in recent weeks. DJ has now been dethroned and Icarito will keep a similar approach this week in trying to maintain his lead.

Chez again headlines Neil's picks this week. If TPC Harding Park skews toward the longer hitters, rule Chez out, right? Not so fast. Chez finished in the Top 15 at both Bellerive and Bethpage…two courses that certainly didn’t favor his profile. Also finished T3 at Pebble in last year’s U.S. Open, so he’s not afraid of or new to major championship pressure. He's also backing Cali natives Max Homa and Xander Schauffele to contend on familiar land.

The Rib has struggled to find the form that made him a weekly contender in 2019 & 2020 prior to the COVID halt. He even tried multiple different putters in Memphis last week. Moreover, his proximity statistic has fallen off recently which has given him less realistic looks at birdie. Still, at 15:1, Neil thinks his potential is too great to pass on at those unusually high odds. If he does win, he may just do so in style according to Neil. His final pick won't finalize until late Sunday evening at the earliest, as he will be waiting to see if the eventual champion can manage to birdie the difficult 72nd. Rory indeed was the last to birdie the last en route to a PGA victory when he did so in 2012 at Kiawah.

 Whether he would admit it or not, who knows, but DJ probably got a little comfy given the lead he had built himself. He couldn't have imagined Neil would be the one to catch him. DJ is part of what you will notice is a bit of a trend in picking Xander this week, both to Top 10 and finish as low Callaway ambassador. Also following Neil's example by believing in Max Homa this week in the hope that he can translate his recent form to a major for the first time.

Shortly following the Rocket Mortgage PMI Classic, DJ emphatically claimed Bryson would lap the field at the PGA considering how well the venue would fit his length. Despite a couple lackluster weeks from Beefy Bryson, DJ is sticking to his guns by picking him to win. The climate in California likely isn't favorable for fire ant colonies to emerge, so consider that one less element Bryson will have to allow for this week. The exact finish bets are back this week and just as unlikely as ever! Still, the payout is too enticing for DJ to pass on, as he will be hoping for a DeChambeau/JT 1,2 punch.

 Back in the killhouse, Randy was able to successfully count to 5 bets and stop this week. Seeing the form Lefty had last week, Randy has absolutely loaded up his chamber with Phil bullets this week. Randy is predicting the "former" California resident Mickelson will beat Joaquin Niemann en route to beating all Callaway staffers. However, there might be a seed of doubt in Randy's mind as he was only comfortable enough to endorse Phil through the first 18 holes.

Evidently the consistency of Matt Fitzpatrick is in for a rude interruption this week. Fitzy is coming in off a solo third at the Memorial and a T6 last week in Memphis and confidence is riding high. Dangerously high, Randy believes, as he's picking the young Brit to MC at +225.

Randy would be very happy to join his strapped brother Neil to root for the winner to birdie the 72nd, though a bogey or worse would suffice his anything but par bet as well. You may think this seems like a smart play at +130, but the winner has parred the last every year since Jason Dufner bogeyed the 18th at Oak Hill in 2013 to seal his victory. One of those victors who parred the last was Jason Day at Whistling in 2015, who coincidentally rounds out the big guy's picks this week. Surprisingly, despite a global pandemic, constant back stiffness and ditching his long-time swing coach (and former caddie) Colin Swatton, J-Day has found something in his game the past month or so. Interesting to see the former world #1 and PGA Champion all the way down at 45:1 this week.

: The controversy continues. The pushback the crew and the fans gave TC for his Heinz 57 play last week didn't bother him in the slightest...and he's back at it again with the white Vans this week. Although none of the crew was able to follow Tron's results last week, I was able to calculate his nugget total and can confirm everything is above board here.

Seemingly shoving to Randy's picks to surely not win the Wanamaker this week, TC is sprinkling the Rib, former world number one Jon Rahm (good run), Chokey Finau and Adam Scott who is still alive. All four plays would potentially serve to keep Tron afloat should his Heinz prove as fruitless as last week.

The Heinz 57 has made everyone irritable and confused so I'll try to break it down as quickly and simply as possible. Each play will be paired with another in a round robin format and judged as a two-way parlay (1&2, 1&3, 1&4, etc.) (15 plays at 1.4 units risked per play=21 units risked.) Next, each play will be paired with two others in a round robin format and judged as a three-way parlay (1,2&3, 1,2&4, 1,2&5, etc.) (20 plays at 1.4 units risked per play=28 units risked.) Third, there will be four-way parlays matched in the same round robin format (15 plays at 1.4 units risked per play=21 units risked.) Then, there will be five-way parlays matched in the six different combinations available (6 plays at 1.4 units risked per play=8.4 units risked.) Finally comes the 6-way mega parlay, which should be familiar to everyone (1 play at 1.4 units risked=1.4 units risked.) The sum total? 79.8 units! So, unless TC hits two of his six Heinz plays at minimum, it is impossible for him to win any portion of the Heinz bet back. Even going three of six last week led to a loss of 58 of his 79.8 units. As confusing as it may seem, I hope this helps. If not, just ignore our resident curmudgeon. 

: Although he's still in the cellar of the standings, Soly is coming off two straight (marginally) positive weeks. You might liken Soly's consistent "big swings" at a large point shift to the swings his largest play will be taking this week. Many forget that the reason Bryson claimed to chase distance was to improve upon the poor results he's had in major championships to this point in his career. Even if he is a sociopath, Bry-guy will have a chance to prove his efforts weren't in vain by winning this week, which would bring Soly back from the depths and into the positive figs. Soly is also wasting, I mean placing, ten of his points on an exact finish box containing the combo of the Mark McGwire version of Bill Nye, and the world's hottest caddie Bones Mackay.

Continuing the love for maybe the most well-rounded player on Tour, Soly is trusting another significant portion of his nuggets toward the hopes of Xander Schauffele this week. X-man, as everyone calls him, has Top 20's in every start but one beginning with his shaky finish at Colonial. He's just a grinder who won't be bothered by difficult conditions or setup this week.

While Brooks will be looking for a couple swing keys from Claude Harmon to get him through the week, Soly's final pick just wants to talk about life, man. The soon-to-be renowned author Bubba Watson has been hit or miss lately and really his entire career. However, a self-proclaimed improved mental game and outlook on the game of golf as it relates to life may give him some new life this week in his chase for his third career major. Remember when he said he was gonna retire if he won 10 times on Tour? What a wildcard. Almost as blasphemous as Daniel Summerhays' retirement proclamation. 

: Really love seeing I'm the only guy on Brooks. He found enough last week to go on. He's just mentally tougher than 99% of the field (s/o the Cat) and physically able to do more than most. If Brooks falters unexpectedly, I expect his buddy DJ to be right there in the mix at a course that may resemble a long U.S. Open venue he has thrived on in the past. I also agree with the crew's near consensus that Xander will make a strong run at his first major win in his native California. Shane Lowry is still often forgotten despite his win last summer at The Open. An excellent pair of hands allows him to excel in the wind and around the greens, so why shouldn't he stand out this week? Abe Ancer and Chez Reavie may not profile well at a course that emphasizes the need for distance. I just can't pass on either given their current form. They both seem primed to take advantage of the best golf of their respective careers.

The standings below are as of completion of play last week. I know they are not at all the same as the graphics that appeared in the video...but trust that DJ (or whoever is editing the gambling videos, don't want to throw Dennis under the bus) has made numerous accounting errors in his standings. For example, Randy was credited a win last week for his Rickie over J-Day pick even though Day did in fact top Fowler in Memphis. Enjoy the PGA! Glory's first shot!! If you like my perspective and want more content related to the crew's picks and year-to-date status, I can be found on twitter and instagram 

NLU picks for the 2020 PGA Championship

Tournament Picks – Travelers Championship

For the third consecutive week, the NLU crew is celebrating the return of golf by making gambling picks via the DraftKings Sportsbook app. To compliment the release of each video (if you missed this week's, 

), the guys have graciously invited me to provide an unbiased 

 breakdown of the crew's predictions. I will also tabulate each week's results and accumulate totals to keep everything as fair as Al Czervik would advise.  

Here are this week's picks, one by one. My take can be found beneath each of the NLU crew's picks in the section labeled 

where scummy, time-consuming greens books are rendered useless.

Bryson DeChambeau to Win (14:1) - Risking 

Collin Morikawa to finish Top 20 (+163) – Risking 

Sergio Garcia to finish Top 20 (2:1) – Risking 

LAST WEEK'S TOTAL: -27 Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: -127 Points.

 UNLEASH THE KRAKEN! Although TPC River Highlands isn't necessarily a bomber's paradise, Soly expects Bryson to untame his beast this week. "B-rye" had another mediocre putting week around a course that neutralized his mass of ass...and still finished T8. His results should improve on a course slightly more suited to his strengths.

Following an usually positive Sunday on the greens for Ser-hee-o, the crew discussed whether they believed he would ever win on Tour again during Monday's recap pod. Soly argued he would "sooner or later" and is putting his proverbial nuggets where his mouth is in literally the earliest possible sense of that phrase. Let's just hope the prickly Spaniard wasn't unintentionally referring to himself when he mentioned there were players more deserving of contracting COVID-19. Taking a flier on Dahmen, a recent

, on a course that has yielded the only 58 in Tour history (shoutout Jax native & WWOG contestant Jim Furyk) seems worth the risk.

After riding with honest Abe all throughout last week, he is notably absent from Soly's lineup this week. My view? Soly had no choice as a founding member of the No Laying Up brand. An endorsement this week would have implied tolerance of Abe's "layup" putt that would have forced a playoff last week.

Ryan Ruffels to Win the Utah Championship (KFT) (90:1) - Risking 

Zac Blair to Finish Top 20 (12:1) – Risking

WEEKLY TOTAL: +49 Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: +19 Points.

Grumpy Tron rolled out of bed and decided to protest the 5-play maximum by making decidedly less than 5 plays. To be fair, his crankiness is likely attributible to spending the previous night speaking with Hitter Blanco about the legality of the arm-lock putting method until the wee hours of the morning. This also would explain the need for his controversial Starbucks cup seen in the preview video.

In an attempt to cheer himself up, TC is following the heart with his picks this week. If you've ever gambled, you know this 

 works out. The potential for over 4,300 points is there...and frankly I think we'd all be stumped if the TC way produces anything less.

Paul Casey to finish Top 5 (9:1) – Risking 

Chez Reavie to finish Top 10 (12:1) – Risking 

**note that Neil originally picked Cam Champ to Top 10 before his W/D**

LAST WEEK'S TOTAL: -100 Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: -200 Points.

A truly puzzling RBC Heritage week for Icarito was perhaps summed up perfectly by his boy Chezzie finishing mini DFL (last of those who survived the cut). If you thought two straight weeks with almost no sign of elite play would deter Icarito from backing Chez again this week, you don't know Icarito. Neil may need an aid to quit Chez as badly as 

On paper, Neil’s picks last week didn’t look great. In reality, they were worse. If the “ethos” of the new gambling segment is to provide a rooting interest for each Sunday, consider Neil’s performance last week a big right miss. But I believe in this week's strategy (which only Neil could surmise) of picking "solid ball-strikers who learned to putt in the last three months."

People are talking. The rumor is that Neil’s anti-Bryson pick last week and obvious avoidance this week may be deeply rooted in jealousy. As Big Randy so righteously pointed out during this past week’s 

, Neil has been on a fitness journey of his own recently (in tandem of course with Shaun T). Unlike Bryson, Icarito’s results have yet to translate into improved play or gambling prowess. The prevailing belief is that the process is bound to produce...but, truthfully, who could say?

Max Homa to finish Top 10 (12:1) - Risking 

Bubba Watson to finish Top 10 (3:1) – Risking 

Viktor Hovland to finish Top 20 (5:2) – Risking 

Bryson DeChambeau to lead after round 1 (20:1) - Risking 

LAST WEEK'S TOTAL: +480 Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: +380 Points.

Last week was redemptive in more ways than one, as DJ’s pointed strategy to back Rahm, Simpson and Smith (all MC’d at Colonial) handsomely rewarded him with 560 nuggets. CBS was unfortuntely unable to get a post-round word with DJ, but many of his delegates commented on his humility, repeating “that’s Dennis” and “he’d never want to make the story about him."

As he admitted, DJ spent his allotment this week the way a child might spend $20 when the ice cream truck rolls into the neighborhood. What good is house money if it can't be spent? Despite acknowledging that the "Hovland can't chip" theory had some serious legs at Harbour Town last week, Dennis is nonetheless electing to test the Norwegian waters this week. I'd say Bryson's odds of leading after round 1 are about as good as Dennis slipping up and saying, "Hello, friends" to open a Wild World of Golf....which is to say, it is very possible.

Randy declined to make picks this week and instead graciously offered his time to assist Colonial CC's Superintendent in mending the 1st teebox. Immediately following, he has scheduled a flight to Hilton Head to tend to the bunker behind the 18th green at Harbour Town that was disgustingly left unkempt by Carlos Ortiz's caddy on Sunday. Hats off, Big Man.

LAST WEEK'S TOTAL: - Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: - Points.

MY PICKS (@total_misread on instagram and twitter):

Abraham Ancer to finish Top 10 (+280) - Risking 

Joaquin Niemann to win "Group D" (+275) - Risking 

(Group D includes Matt Fitzpatrick, Sergio Garcia, Tony Finau & Marc Leishman)

Matchup parlay: 1. Paul Casey over Gary Woodland 2. Patrick Cantlay over Justin Rose (+230) - Risking 

LAST WEEK'S TOTAL: -10 Points. YEAR TO DATE TOTAL: -72 Points.

 Ball-striking travels. At least I'm hopeful that will be the case for Abe and Jaco,  whom both flushed it last week. As I mentioned earlier, Bryson was able to manage a top 10 in an off-week at Harbour Town. Expect the full arsenal to be on display (barring a return to poor TV coverage) in Cromwell this week. Casey and Cantlay both have solid resumes at TPC River Highlands and come in as fresh as can be this week. I think they best Woodland and Rosie who are now competing in their third straight week. Harman may have the ugliest putter in golf, but I'll take a chance on Tron's fellow southpaw at those inflated odds.

3. Scott Schaeffer (@total_misread) -72 points

That'll do it. If you're interested in a recap of each week's results, up-to-date standings of the NLU crew and other golf/gambling related content, I can be found on Instagram and Twitter @total_misread. Like the NLU guys, I'm not quite a sharp…just a golf addict enjoying that these picks create a concrete rooting interest for us each week.

As has been the case the last couple weeks, look for the Rocket Mortgage Classic gambling preview video to be released next Tuesday. I feel humbled that the guys are allowing me to collaborate and be a small part of their content with these written previews. 

NLU Odds Preview - Travelers Championship

Full disclosure before we get started: My allegiance is to the United States, and 

I am on the record as predicting a United States victory by a margin of 16-12

. I’m not going back on that prediction now that Tiger’s won for the first time in five years. The Americans are a slight betting favorite, and by all accounts, they should be. This is perhaps the strongest team the United States has taken to a Ryder Cup since the expansion of the competition to include all of Europe in 1979.

Nonetheless, this is European Tour blog, so I’m going to take the Stars-and-Stripes-laden aviators off for a while and have some fun letting my imagination run wild about a Team Europe victory.

It me (prior to and immediately after writing this column).

Am I nuts for writing a few thousand words about a completely insane hypothetical? YES! But, if nothing else, this should be a fun exercise in giving the Euros something to hope for and the Yanks something to chew on for the next couple of days. We’ll see how close we are to any of these if Europe ends up holding the Ryder Cup on European soil, as it has done every time hosting since 1993. Let’s go to Crazytown!

The Americans came to play. Webb Simpson gets to hit the opening tee shot and atones for his 2014 sky-ball with a perfectly striped hybrid right down the Av. des Champs-Elysées. He and DJ team up for the opening session against the formidable Rose/Stenson duo. In a back-and-forth match, the Americans get an early 2 up lead. Rose and Stenson battle down the stretch to squeak out a 1 up victory, putting the first full point on the board for the Europeans and quelling any American dreams of setting up a big lead in the opening foursomes session (a la Hazeltine).

The second and third matches are played to half-point draws each, as the teams of Hatton/Fleetwood and Molinari/Noren draw with Mickelson/Fowler and Reed/Spieth, respectively.

In the fourth match, Poulter and McIlroy lose a surprising bout 3&2 to the team of Koepka and Watson, wherein Poulter’s putter never really gets going after Rory leaves him a bunch of 25+ footers due to ongoing struggles with distance control. On the other hand, Brooks comes out of his morning lift feeling “extra swole” and “super jacked,” and Bubba avoids the baguettes and brie–having instead some tasty grilled cheese sandwiches for breakfast using flown-in Wonderbread and Kraft singles (shout out Team Chef Mike Ramsey – Jacksonville Golf and Country Club’s finest).

The Euros struggle in this session. Neither Rahm nor Garcia were pleased about sitting out the morning matches, but instead of channeling that frustration into a victory, they run into the high-fivin’, butt-slappin’, Mizzen & Main dancin’ duo of Mickelson and Finau. The Big Tabernacle has no nerves, and rattles off 7 birdies in the first 10 holes en route to a 5&4 victory over the “fiery” Spaniards. We are reminded that they are “fiery” on the broadcast at least twice per hour. Mickelson hits it all over the yard, but instead of looking intently for lost balls in the wispy grasses, he fires up his iPhone mid-round to (1) Periscope Finau’s fourth straight birdie on the 6th hole to take a 4 up lead, and (2) bet the Phil/Finau–Tiger/Bryson–JT/Spieth parlay.

When the parlay hits but you don’t gamble so you just gotta act excited for your partner.

It ends up being a solid bet, as Tiger and Bryson take Olesen and Casey to the woodshed, while #TeamGoodBuddies Spieth and Thomas eek out a close one against Stenson and Rose. Phil is always the smartest guy in the room, and he knew enough not to bet against team “Fleetwood Mac” who provide the loan bright spot in the afternoon by going their own way to win a point against the surprise team of Reed and Rickie, who don’t even want to pretend to like each other long enough to ever be competitive in the duel.

Second Session: EUR 1 – USA 3. Day 1 Overall: EUR 3 – USA 5.

Facing a 2 point deficit, the Europeans put some stallions out in the early morning fourball session. Team Fleetwood Mac continues their dominance, this time against the team of Phil and Rickie. Rory channels those visions from the 2014 PGA Championship of Mickelson and Fowler high-fiving in the group in front of him, which leads to him suddenly finding the center of the club face with a few wedges. Meanwhile, Garcia and Rahm get revenge facing off against Brock Cupcake and Justin Thomas. Team #JupLife skipped leg day, and as a result, the glutes just weren’t getting fully activated. With two blue flags on the board early, a new pairing of Tiger and Reed find a way to gut out a point against Poulter and Casey, but Stenson and Rose are too much for le Artisté and DJ, who prove that opposites do not always attract. The match ends on a sour note when Bryson yells at DJ to “read a fuckin’ book!” after the round so they might have something to talk about next time. DJ does not take that advice. The result is a big session for the Euros and the tide shifting back in their direction.

Third Session: EUR 3 – USA 1. Overall: EUR 6 – USA 6.

The Yanks have a problem. Captain Furyk knows he needs to get Bryson’s mind right–and Cat might be just the medicine. However, he doesn’t want to break up the newfound revelation of Tiger and Reed. What’s more, Tiger didn’t plan on playing two sessions on the same day anyway. This conundrum leads to a pretty heated argument among the vice captains, and it ends with Zach Johnson and Matt Kuchar putting their balding heads together to come up with a BRILLIANT(!) solution: sit them both.

With Tiger and Bryson on the pine, the captains feuding, and the Euros with all the momentum, the Americans are reeling. The team of DJ and Webb gets another go of it, but they aren’t able to find the magic they had on Friday morning, and lose a close one 2&1 to Molinari and Noren. Poulter and Casey are back for another round, and this time, it clicks against Thomas and Fowler. Poults gets it going early, draining a long birdie putt on the first and another one on the third. After Casey stripes a drive on the fourth, Poulter steps up and calls in the precision air strike for an eagle from 190 yards out.

Close your eyes for a moment and picture what an eagle by Poulter from 190 in a Ryder Cup would look like. In reality, it is far, far worse than what you’re imagining. His eyes bulging, his chest pounding, his teeth gritting…Poulter lets out a wail that happens to be mic’d up and not caught by the five-second delay. Johnny Miller can only muster a “whoops…sorry ’bout that folks” as Poulter screams, “FUCK YOU, UNCLE SAM, YOU WANKER!” running down the fairway at full sprint speed. The match is over before it begins, and by a margin of 6&5, #TeamJupLife(PartDeux) get dealt an embarrassing defeat. Somewhere, Jose Maria Olazabal is smiling.

Thankfully for USA, the Mickelson and Finau pairing proves to have some juice. This time, it’s Phil doing the heavy lifting, as Rahm and Hatton can’t stand the fun-loving, west coast vibe coming from the Big Lefty and the Big Tabernacle. Hatton and Rahm both say a LOT of words out loud on the golf course, but all of them are directed inward or towards their respective golf balls. And while each of them tries their best to keep the other mentally on planet Earth, there’s too much lost in translation between the two, as both seem to always have both hands covering their mouths/faces after every single putt, preventing the words of encouragement from being fully understood.

What is #RahmThreat saying here? Your guess is as good as mine. Photo cred: AP News.

The USA trots out ol’ reliable Spieth and Reed in the final pairing, going up against Fleetwood Mac. In what turns out to be the tightest, most entertaining match of the team sessions, the Americans jump out to a quick 2 up lead. Fleetwood gets the bug and turns into Fleekwood the Flusher, dropping a couple of quick dimes in the middle holes leading to a pair of conceded birdies. Rory then finds his wedge game, getting the Euros a 1 up lead on 16, but Spieth and Reed dig deep. Coming down to the last hole, Spieth is faced with a 5 footer to win the hole and halve the match. Reed, feeling inspired, takes Spieth aside and tells him about that time when he got put in the line drive section, but decided to take matters into his own hands and upgrade his seats while tagging the TOUR not once, but TWICE in the same shady tweet. Spieth looks confused. “Take this match into your own hands…UPGRADE FROM THE LINE DRIVE SECTION!” Reed growls, spittle raining from his grimacing face. It’s the most inspirational speech Reed’s ever given…just ask him.

Something about it resonates, though. Spieth lines up the putt, gives it a tentative, beta-male tap, and it trundles end-over-end toward the cup. At the last second it dives right to the low side of the hole, but catches just enough to do a full 360 and find the bottom. We, the golfing public, get a highlight that will live forever, and Spieth for the first time in his life, gets to experience what it’s like to be the Alpha. The USA grinds out a half-point.

Fourth Session: EUR 2.5 – USA 1.5. Overall: EUR 8.5 – USA 7.5.

Everyone was hoping for another heavyweight Rory v. Reed bout, but this one turns out to be almost as much fun. Big J hits the ground running, lighting up the front nine with a blistering 31. But Rory keeps pace, and only finds himself 1 down at the turn. Rors rattles off two quick birdies on 10 and 11 to take a 1 up lead. Then, JT finds a groove, sparks fly, and he rallies with a birdie-birdie-birdie stretch to build a 2 up lead of his own with four to play. On 15, however, Thomas hits it in the water off the tee and ends up conceding the hole. Rory seizes the opening, and throws and absolute dart at the short sixteenth that almost finds the bottom of the hole. Another concession, and suddenly, the match is tied with 2 holes to go. Pars halve the seventeenth, but Rory takes an ultra-aggro line on eighteen and rips one of those *rocket emoji* drives into the stratosphere. JT follows suit and also sends one into space. Two generational drivers of the golf ball show us what it means to unload.

Thomas is away, and finds the middle of the green with his approach. Rory, again smelling blood, takes dead aim and finds the surface only 10 feet below the hole. A Thomas miss; a Rory make; a European point. Rory wins 1 up.

Hush little Big J. Don’t say a word. Rory’s gonna buy you a dozen birds.

A proxy war for “most in the ass of NLU,” Noren gets deep on Soly in the opening foray, hopping out to a 2 up lead through eight. Not to be outdone, the Ricktator finds himself knocking down two quick tweeters on fourteen and fifteen to take it back to all square. After the second putt drops, the camera cuts to Rickie and he winks playfully, directly into Big Randy’s soul. In the end, however, Noren cruises to a full point by parring sixteen and seventeen and getting a conceded eighteenth after Rickie’s second finds the drink. Soly relaxes because “it’s not like Noren 

.” Randy googles “how to say schadenfreude in French.”

In the #VisorWar, Poulter prevails. He makes a comment on the first tee about Bubba playing a putt-putt ball for all of 2017, and Bubba, without a good comeback, is thrown off his game immediately. Bubba starts getting pissed about “not having enough trees to aim at” or something. Bubba tries to drive the short par 4 tenth, but overcooks his “baby fade” into the drink, concedes the hole, and goes 4 down. After getting a gust and coming up short in the water on the par 3 eleventh, Bubba goes OFF on his caddie and #PrayforTedScott is trending on Twitter for the first time in a while. Poulter wins 7&6 and puts the first point on the board for Europe of the afternoon, as his match finishes a solid hour before Rory’s.

Nothing good happens for the Yanks when Poulter puts on the mean mug every other September. Photo cred: Sky Sports.

The most contentious moment of the matches in nearly twenty years happens early on the par 5 third. With the match all square early, Reed tries his helicopter-finish fade off the tee, but it drifts on a gnarly zephyr way out to the right and into the water. Reed takes a drop, but the location is…um…a little suspect. Initially, Rose didn’t see it, because his pull-draw ended up in the left rough, about 50 yards away from Reed. Reed plays his shot quickly, before Rose really knows what’s going on. After Rose plays, while walking up to the next shot, Paddy Harrington tells Fooch and Rose that he thinks the drop was unsporting. Once they get to the green, Fooch and Rose confront Patrick about the drop, Reed immediately gets in Fooch’s face, and Fooch is ready to throw hands. Just before a kerfuffle can break out on the green, Matt Kuchar comes over to act as peacekeeper and break it up. Reed ends up losing the hole, but it lights a fire under him for the rest of the match, and he goes on to torch Rose 4&3. After he barely shakes Rose’s hand, and doesn’t shake Fooch’s, the crowd boos while Reed gives them the classic “shush” finger. Word quickly spreads around to the rest of the course and Johnny Miller calls it “not his finest moment, folks.”

Match 5: Francesco Molinari v. Bryson DeChambeau

Feeling dejected from the previous day, DeChambeau gets off to a rough start. Molinari ballstrikes him into oblivion over the first six holes and jumps out to quick 4 up lead. DeChambeau hears it from the crowd, as they repeatedly jeer him for having a “french-sounding name” but not being able to speak at word of the mother tongue. Meanwhile, Molinari looks like he’s mostly just strolling in the park, and although Bryson fights and claws his way back into the match, he still loses 3&2.

There’s a lot of Blue on the board, and Webb Simpson might seem like an unlikely hero for the Americans. But the most startlingly handsome lad on the squad makes it a quietly productive week. Casey just looks somewhat tired and disinterested from the start, while Webb seems to be 100% dialed in. Casey misses a few key putts in the early going, while Webb is repeatedly wet from distance. Scrambling to find some momentum, Casey makes a little run in the middle holes, but ultimately, Webb keeps his composure and is able to close out the match and put a full point on the board for the United States, winning 3&2 with a drippy birdie on the 16th green.

Webb leading the field in SG: Stealin’ ya Girl. (Yes, I already made this joke on Twitter. Bite me.) Photo Cred: Golf Channel/Getty Images.

Match 7: Tyrrell Hatton v. Jordan Spieth

With no shortage of drama, who better to get the back half started with a quiet reprieve than two guys known for keeping completely to themselves and going about their business. Just kidding.

In what becomes a sadly hilarious spectacle of self-talk turned self-loathing turned self-immolation, the Hatton and Spieth match demonstrates why getting the players mic’d up makes all the difference. After Feherty runs out of pithy things to say about how neither golf ball seems to want to listen, the production truck actually puts a booth fatwa on any commentary during their match after the fourteenth hole, where they find themselves all square. That’s right…on the last four holes, Dan and Johnny completely let Tyrrell and Spieth do all the talking.

Spieth starts with a wild push slice right on the fifteenth tee, 20 yards into the water. As soon as he hits it, Spieth shrieks a mighty “GOODNESS, JORDAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? THERE’S 70 YARDS OF FAIRWAY OVER THERE!!!”

Hatton, not to be #outdun, doesn’t club down but instead hits driver, and ALSO finds the water right. Hatton, in fullblown surrender cobra, compliments himself thusly: “Awww bollocks, you bloody stewpid muppet!”

The two go on like this until the eighteenth green, where neither seems to want to win any battle other than who can tell themselves they suck more. The match plays to the most amusing halve in Ryder Cup history.

Great form on the surrender cobra. Photo cred: N.Y. Post.

Finau justifies his pick throughout the Matches, but perhaps nowhere moreso than in the singles. With a winning record already assured by his 2-0 start, Finau decides to put the icing on the pastry and decimates a flustered Rahm, who has had a first Ryder Cup he would probably like to forget up to this point. The matchup promised to be a bomb-n-gouge tour de force, but ended up being a rout. Rahm gets inside his own head early by missing several short putts, while Finau keeps pouring them in with reckless abandon. For a much lauded pick, Finau shows just what he is capable of with the pressure on and his team in desperate need of a point. Tony plants the Stars and Stripes firmly on the board, and notches a full point for the Yanks.

Match 9: Tommy Fleetwood v. Brooks Koepka

Another match that surely spells fireworks, Fleetwood is treated to the opportunity to exact revenge on Brooksie for the U.S. Open. One is pure power, the other so much finesse. The players trade blows early and often, with each player netting birdies left and right, but neither of them are able to gain any ground. Koepka finally breaks free with a timely eagle on the par 5 ninth. He follows that with the most spectacular, soaring tee shot on the driveable tenth, and rattles in a second consecutive eagle from 28 feet, while Fleetwood looks to his caddie, and utters, “Not sure I’ve got that one, Fino.” Fino responds, “Right, mighty [inaudible] good [unintelligible] cracking one, that.” Koepka puts the pedal down and finds another point for the United States to cap off one of the single most dominant seasons in modern golf. Brock the Jock is simply too good. The residents of Fleetwood Island weep uncontrollably.

Match 10: Thorbjorn Olesen v. Dustin Johnson

With only three matches left on the course, and the tide turning quickly back toward the Americans, Team Europe need two of their three captain’s picks to step up and claim full points in order to win the cup outright. One would expect Thorbjorn to perhaps cave under the pressure of facing the number one player in the world and the most explosive golfer on the planet. But something doesn’t quite seem right for DJ on this Sunday. Part of the problem is the course setup takes driver out of his hand. Another issue is that it just hits him 3 minutes before he tees off that he casually blew a putt for $10 million at East Lake a week ago to the day. A third problem is the text he woke up to from the Great One telling him he is banned from wearing the number 99 L.A. Kings sweater when he hits his opening tee shot. The hits keep coming.

Thorbjorn, meanwhile, digs deep for the locker-room material. He harkens back to the No Laying Up Podcast, Episode 166, when Soly said, “Olesen isn’t the caliber of player that plays in the Ryder Cup.” Thunderbear is having none of it. He lets fly from the opening tee shot and goes on an opening tear, popping four birds on the first four holes. If Deej wasn’t shook before, he’s very shook now.

Thomas Bjorn watches eagerly as Olesen dismantles Johnson. Hole after hole, Olesen puts on an a ball striking clinic. DJ eventually finds a little footing on the back half, but by then it’s too late. Thorbjorn is able to make a snaking putt on the sixteenth hole to seal the deal of a 3&2 victory over DJ, and an all-time Ryder Cup upset.

Match 11: Henrik Stenson v. Phil Mickelson

Who wouldn’t want a chance to see Henrik and Phil run it back one more time from the 2016 Open Championship? That magical Sunday, when the Swede was able to edge Phil’s electric 65 with a final round 63 of his own to claim his first Major, felt like it could never be topped. Although the pairing elicited tons of opportunities to re-live those highlights on Saturday night, the Sunday redux in Paris, understandably and predictably, doesn’t live up the the hype. In fact, it’s worse than that. Stenson’s elbow inflammation is persistent on the morning of the singles, and although he tries to give it a go, Henrik’s tentative to engage the turf. The result is a number of thinly bladed iron shots and a complete lack of distance control. Stenson, finding himself 6 down through 10 and the pain too much to bear, concedes the match. Phil acts respectfully to his opponent, and mutters a few kind words about “wishing he could have gotten another shot at him at his best” as they shake hands.

Phil then immediately cracks open his phone on the golf cart ride over the action with Tiger and Sergio.

“Hi, I’m Phil Mickelson, pro golfer. I used to have painful elbow inflammation caused by psoriatic arthritis. Then I talked to my doctor about Enbrel.”

Much has been written of the new affable, likable, fun-loving Tiger. “Tiger seems to get along with his peers.” “Tiger has humbly transformed into the elder statesman on Tour.”

What does Sergio think of all that? “Mierda,” that’s what.

Much as been written of whether Sergio deserved a Captain’s pick. “He’s looked completely out of sorts the past three months.” “He hasn’t made a cut in the U.S. since March.”

What does Tiger think of all that? “Bullshit,” that’s what.

See, the blood is bad between these two. Of all the people Tiger would want to thrash on Sunday afternoon with a Ryder Cup on the line, El Niño would be numbers 1-99. And of all the people Sergio would love to take down to show all the haters and losers how wrong they were, El Gato Grande would likewise be the guy. There is a palpable, sour, gritty taste in the air on the first tee. 10,000 strong here to see the Cat and the Kid. Tiger blisters his opening tee shot–a 2 iron stinger that never gets 20 feet off the ground, followed by a twirl so hard, you’d think he was about to go airborne. Sergio, not to be outdone, takes 3 wood and aims for the incredibly aggressive line up the far right side, carrying all the mounding and skirting the water to leave a mere flip wedge into the green. The two exchange brief looks walking off the first tee box and into the gauntlet.

By nipping a crispy little hold-off wedge into the green 8 feet below the hole, Tiger applies the early pressure. Sergio answers, stuffing his wedge into gimme range. Billy Baroo isn’t glowing hot yet, but you can’t birdie them all unless you birdie the first. Tiger rattles the back of the hole…with AUTHORITY. Birdies halve the hole.

The two trade pars on the second, and birdies on the par 5 third. Two more pars on the fourth and fifth. Then, on the sixth, Sergio draws first blood. Tiger tries to get cute with his tee shot, but squirts one low and off the toe way out to the right in the heavy stuff, where he’s only able to hack it back to the fairway, 15 yards short of the green. Sergio pitches his second into gimme range, and when Tiger fails to convert his own pitch shot, Garcia finds himself 1 up.

The pair trade pars on the seventh, but Cat is able to gobble up the difference on the eighth, when he stiffs his tee ball to 2 feet from a mere 213 yards away. Sergio has a 30 footer that never threatens, but comes up within tap in range. There is a tense moment when Tiger looks to Sergio, as if to say “This is good, right?” Sergio never drops eye contact, and never mutters a word. Tiger replaces his ball, and in a moment that seems to be a call back to all of the history between the two, Tiger one-hand putts his ball into the hole just to show Sergio that, “Yes, you asshole. This was fucking good.”

Tiger’s blood is boiling as he walks to the ninth. Joey is able to calm him down somewhat, but there is some redass to be taken out on the next Bridgestone he puts on the peg. Top Tracer shows that 190 ball speed ain’t just for the kids, but also for the Cat. Notah Begay says he hasn’t seen him swing at one that hard since Stanford. Johnny Miller timely adds, “For all you folks at home, this is why when you find yourself playing your next match play against Tiger Woods, you should really not make him mad.” We will all miss Johnny Miller. Sergio answers with two good shots of his own, but finds himself right of the green in two well below the hole in a collection area. Tiger’s second, on the other hand, is a beautiful, high-flying fade that lands perfectly at the front of the green and trundles up to 10 feet below the hole. Sergio hits a remarkable shot to get up and down for birdie, but Tiger’s eagle try rolls perfectly end over end into the dead middle. Tiger is 1 up after nine.

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